Because People Need to Know

The boy scouts have an a long illustrious history. They have served Americans throughout the ages in various forms: teaching young boys responsibility, decorating doors in Christmas wreathes, helping old ladies across the street, and selling those wonderful cookies. Wait, girl scouts sell the cookies, but I eat them in honor of the boy scouts. But the best part of boy scouts by far is the earning of merit badges. These small, round little wonders let the world know, that you are not some simple loser, but that you have accomplished something, you are somebody. But alas, all those not active in boy scout-dom have been deprived of the immense joy and sense of accomplishment contained in that small cotton patch. All that is about to change. For the first time ever, I'm offering the everyman scout merit badges. Using the top secret method I can custom make a merit badge, so you can show the world, what you have accomplished. This is going to be the first line of badges:

Watched the Entire First Season of Macgyver Merit Badge

Maxed Out All My Credit Cards Merit Badge

Master Myspace Design Layout Merit Badge

and my personal favorite, Mashed Potato Sculpture Merit Badge

This is just the start of, I hope, a long history of enabling people to proudly wear their accomplishments for all to see. But I need more ideas, so everybody, cough'em up. Tell me what I should make into the second wave of badges. No one is exempt, no accomplishment to small, no reference too vague, lets show the world, I am Somebody.