I'm Colored (Sort of a Atomic Tangerine)

Just the Usual

My dog died today. Yeah, boy, was it depressing. I had to dig a hole to put him in. Dirt is pretty sad stuff. It smells funny and makes my clothes dirty. I don't even know how I can go on being so sad and depressing all the time. *sigh.*

Prisoner of Love

My friend keeps her boyfriend in a pink box. I've seen it. Its a small box, it fits right in the palm of her hand. I don't know how she got him to fit in such a small space, but she is just that kind of girl. I think he must have done something very wrong to end up in the small pink package, but he sounds happy. I got to see his face once. She showed me, he was peering out of the small window in the box, smiling back at me. Then he turned off the light and I couldn't see him anymore. My friend seems happiest when she is with her pink box. She holds it, pressed to her ear. She has a big smile and giggles sometimes, with a little snort at the end, if its really funny. The boyfriend must also have a radio in there, because sometimes he plays music, and sometimes he must have company, because he isn't the only voice I've heard from the box. But most of the time, its just him and her. And sometimes he wants to talk to her so bad, he shakes that box so hard it makes the whole table vibrate. But sometimes I see my friend and she has tears in her eyes. I think its because she wants her boyfriend to get out of the box, but neither of them remember how he got in, in the first place. But I know they'll remember one day, and they'll be able to hold hands again or kiss, and she'll never need that pink box ever again. Lets hope so.

For Patric

This is a public apology.
Patric, I'm sorry for my actions, they were acted out in arrogance and ignorance. I can only state that they were drawn from a heart that genuinely cares about you and seeks your well being. You know where I draw my world view and how this puts us at odds. I can't change this, only attempt to explain its relevancy and necessity. That is what I attempted to do with our last talk. I'm not sure, actually I am, this is not how you took it. I love you, just because, though it may seem otherwise. I can only attempt to live out that point. I'm going to give you your space and if you decide I deserve another chance, I wait.

Please, everybody else, don't leave comments. Thank you.

Still Hungry?

A quick addendum to my yesterday. I didn't really say anything about the part that stated, oh, this is back to Hebrews 9:14, if you'll turn with me in your bibles, "...who through the eternal spirit offered himself unblemished to God...". I think its crazy, most of us recognize the work done by Christ, but most of us never knew that it was done through the Holy Spirit. What does that mean to me? If Christ, who was perfect and could do whatever he wanted, because he was God, had to offer himself to God through the Spirit, or didn't have to, but it was orchestrated that way. It infers a model to how we are to offer ourselves to God. Now, how to make this applicable? I don't know, its just a thought, probably a "duh" to most of you. I like looking for the secrets. The Bible says there are mysteries of God and that they are revealed to us through the Holy Spirit, which searches the mind of God. That's mad cool! I want that. So this Holy Spirit Dude has definitely got something to offer. In other verses it mentions his teaching abilities and his ability to bring comfort. So how do we interact with him? I guess I need to find an answer.

Its What I Know

I have nothing to really report so I'm just going to riff off of some random idea.
I've decided to form my reality to perceive the literal more metaphorically, and the metaphorically more literal. I hope I don't lose my mind in the process, but hey there is always the off chance I'll find it again. Anyways back to the point, let me illustrate. In a literal sense, America is very uncaring of its youth. Now to replace with a metaphor. America feeds her children to the flames to fuel the machine. I'm drawing this from the biblical accounts of the child sacrifices to Moloch. I'm intending later to work it into a project w/ this concept forming the basis for one of the planets within the entire theme. The machine is power and success, affluence. We do it in the name of the future and prosperity, much like the people in the Bible did, to bring the rains, supposedly. I find it so ironic we destroy our future to secure it, and its becoming painstakingly obvious to even non-believers. Though the solution is much debated. Broken homes, drug use, absent fathers, and drug use to enforce obedience and complacency, are the charred remains of our children. These are the steps we've taken to provide luxury and prosperity to ourselves. We live in pleasure at the cost of our children. It is just that simple. Now to take a metaphor and bring it to a more literal sense. I find myself struggling in some stronghold that will remain unspoken, its nothing new, its just gained new urgency in the passing days. While seeking answers to overcome this stranglehold, I stumbled across these words. "
They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony..."
Revelations 12:11a
The blood is a recurring theme in my faith, but one that is not very well understood by me. I decided that a key to my victory was in this blood. But everything I come across seem to just be some hocus pocus, voodoo who do something no one can explain. So I don't like not understanding things and set my mind to the task. Blood in the Bible is atonement, which is a big word for amends. It makes up for, easy enough. So Christ blood makes up for our sins. End of story, right? It is, in a sense, the work of the blood is done, but its got to sink into our brains. We have to grasp that its done. This is broke down in Hebrews 9:14, which goes something like this:
"...the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, [will] cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death/useless rituals, so that we may serve the living God!"
So more victory, good stuff. Christ's blood is God's forgiveness and as we grasp this, grasp this amend that has been made it will wash our brains from hating God and following stupid rules to actually doing what God wants. Forgiving is a huge part of God's economy, so much so that he states that if we don't forgive others, God won't forgive us. But don't fear, Christ's blood is at work cleanse our minds, helping us to give up those lethal acts. So I guess to wrap it up, my goal is to seek a better understanding of God's forgiveness and loyal love, that is what being cleansed is all about. Its pretty easy, every sin and shortcoming I have creates an opportunity for God to pour in His forgiveness and love, and every Scripture helps to deepen the depth of those moments. I'm sorry Patric for talking religion, its just where I'm at today. To everybody else. Please feel free to criticize me and to raise questions about my understanding and interpretation. I want to know the whole Truth and not just my understanding of it. I hope this leaves you encouraged and maybe a touch refreshed, but mostly I pray it creates a curiosity towards God.

I AM, the Church

I would like everybody to check these out and tell me what you think.
I haven't spent a lot of time looking in to it but what I saw was very moving.
smallfire.org
alternativeworship.org
emergingchurch.info